I know that you seek answers. But sometimes, you do not need to know more: you only need to rest in the present, understand that everything is in accordance with God’s plans, that God’s plans never fail, and learn to cultivate gratitude in the present.
You already know God; you have already seen and heard, felt and touched His presence. In the present, remember God, because the seed God casts to you so that you may remember Him is given because you have strayed from Him.
Instead of living on seeds, learn to water them, and they will bear fruit in an astonishing way. You only have to feel the love upon you, the gratitude, the peace, and the joy of being with God. Feel them continually, because God is constantly present by your side.
Fragments of an awakened soul 